NurtureShock

This weekend I read NurtureShock: New Thinking About Children by Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman. One of the blurbs on the back of the book by the Houston Chronicle reads, “I feel like I’ve been smacked between the eyes with a two-by-four,” and that’s a good description of my reaction as well! In ten short, accessible chapters, the authors review some of the most controversial recent findings about how children learn and turn them on their head. Issues ranging from why teenagers lie (it’s not as bad as you think!) to gifted programs in Kindergarten (they don’t work) to how babies learn to talk (TV doesn’t help), practical illumination is shed on the mounds of contradictory research. The authors repeatedly emphasize the fact that research done on adults or college students cannot be applied to children because their brains are developmentally different – a point well made in their chapter “The Lost Hour” about the importance of sleep on not only academics, but also seemingly unrelated issues such as obesity and ADHD. The chapter I enjoyed the most was “The Inverse Power of Praise” which describes how praising children for effort makes them hard-working and resilient, whereas praising children for innate intelligence actually makes them hesitant to take risks because they are afraid to fail. Our faculty speaker last April, Lisa Damour, explained research by Carol Dweck on the same phenomenon and presented a “brain training” program – which we are starting in the Middle School next week – to counteract this effect. Although I found some of the conclusions alarming because I recognize some of my own mistakes as a parent in their work, each chapter also offered small, concrete ways to correct these missteps, which I plan to start using in my own home immediately!

Shanghai Girls

Shanghai Girls is the story of two sisters living in Shanghai just prior to World War II. They work in the evening as "beautiful girls" and model for various artists. When their family falls on hard times, their father makes arrangements to send them to California to marry Chinese men living in America. As they are about to leave for America, the Japanese invade Shanghai causing panic and destruction.

They endure many hardships on the way to America, and when they arrive they are detained for many months at an immigration facility. This is a story of life during war, but it is also a story of personal courage and love for family. Author Lisa See wrote Snow Flower and the Secret Fan and her fans will not be disappointed with this novel.

The Help

Kathryn Stockett's remarkable new novel takes place in Jackson, Mississippi during the early 1960's. It is told from the point of view of Aibileen and Minny, both black women who have spent their lives working for white families. Aibileen's employer is encouraged to install a bathroom in the garage so that the family will not have to use the same bathroom as the help. This is openly discussed in front of Aibileen as she serves the Bridge Club. Skeeter is a young white woman who is an aspiring writer, and she decides to interview maids around Jackson and write a book about their experiences working for white families. Because the maids are fearful of losing their jobs, everything must be done in secret.

There are so many layers to this wonderful story, and it is the perfect book for discussion groups. If you grew up in the South, you will recognize many people in the story.